buttheadlover

Does anyone actually read this thing anymore?

quiz HOW GIRLIE ARE YOU/ HOW COMFORTABLE ARE YOU AS A STRAIGHT MAN TO ANSWER HONESTLY!!!!

WHAT YOU HAVE:
[ ] You own over 10 bottles of nail polish
[ ] You own a designer purse
[x] You own perfume that cost over $60
[x ] You HAD/have fake nails
[x] You have more body/hair products than you can use
[ ] Your pet is a chihuahua/Pomeranian/Yorks hire Terrier/Siamese/Shih Tzu
[ ] You have clothes/shoes/accessories for your pet
[x] You have enough clothes to cover an entire refugee camp.
[ x] You have enough pictures to create your own wallpaper.
{] A pink comforter, carpeting, walls or sheets.
Total: 5

Do you:
[] Spend more time at the mall than you do at home/work
[X] Have a hair color that is not natural
[ ] Have "blonde moments" at least once a day
[ ] Buy stuff because it's awesome and then never wear it
[X] Constantly keep your phone at your side
[X] Dance around in your room when nobody else is home
[X] Have a name for your car
[x] Know what celebrity is dating who and who broke up this week
[ ] Refuse to go out in public without makeup
[ ] Prefer to be called "princess"
total: 5

DO YOU ADORE:
[] Makeup
[ ] Glitter
[] The Color Pink
[] Jewelry
[] Mirrors
[] Chick flicks
[X] Shoes
[] Rainbows
[] Unicorns
[] Disney Movies
[] Candles
[] Flowers
[] Stuffed Animals
[] Purses
Total:1

DO YOU SHOP REGULARLY AT:
[ ] Coach
[ ] Forever 21
[ ] Victoria's Secret (or any other bra/lingere shop)
[ ] Guess
[] Claires
[ ] express
[ ] Delias
[ ] Hollister
[x ] American Eagle
[ ] Abercrombie & Fitch
[ ] Aeropostale
Total: 1

DO YOU SAY:
[] Bitch
[x] Whatever
[] Oh my gosh/goodness (goddess?)
[] Hun (only at work, annoying as hell)
[ ] Fugly
[] That's hot
[ ] Dunzo
[] Darling
[ ] Pish
[] Cutie
[] Hottie
[ ] Skank
[X] Totally
[X] For Sure
[] Fabulous
Total: 3

Do You Read:
[ ] Cosmopolitan
[ ] Glamour
[ ] Marie Claire
[ ] Elle Girl
[ ] Teen Vogue
[ x] People
[x ] Us Weekly
[ ] Star
[ ] Self
[ ] PerezHilton.com
[ ] Dlisted.com
[ ] 17online.com
[ ] people.com
[ ] usmagazine.com
[ ] popsugar.com
[ ] Pink Is The New Blog.com
Total: 2

Do You Love These:
[] Legally Blonde
[] Elizabethtown
[X] Mean Girls
[] Now & Then
[x] The Notebook
[x] A Walk to Remember
[x] Sweet Home Alabama
[] Where the Heart is
[ ] Just my luck
[ ] John Tucker Must Die
[x] Center stage
[] Bring it On
[] How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
[] Mona Lisa Smile
[ ] My Girl
Total:5

Do you really enjoy...
[ ] America's Next Top Model
[ ] Project Runway
[] Desperate Housewives
[ ] The Simple Life
[ ] 8th & Ocean
[ x] Sex & the City
[] Grey's Anatomy
[ ] The O.C.
[x ] Laguna Beach/The Hills
[ ] Nip/Tuck
[ ] Gilmore Girls
[ ] Degrassi
Total: 2

GRAND TOTAL:24

When I think of how amazing the Great Big number will be, I get chills.

So I guess I'm going to ge a bit personal here, which I typically dont do. Over the past few months, there has been something going on in my life that I need to set straight. For those of you who havent known me long, I used to be 40 lbs heavier. In Jan of this year I made a promise to myself that I was going to be my target weight by the end of this year. I reached my target weight in November. I do want to say that I'm proud of myself. While I know i did lose a lot of weight and for some people, it may look alarming, personal opinions don't need to be thrown in my face. I constantly get comments about "wasting away", getting too tiny, did you stop eating?, where did you go?....etc. I was at work the other day and I saw my boss staring at me and shaking her head. She was talking to one of the girls I work with about me. The girl walked up to me and said "Steacie says you need to start eating and stop losing weight". This is the kind of comment that really hurts me. Not only was she talking about me behind my back, but she thinks i dont eat. For the past few months I have been fighting off comments from people about me having an eating disorder. For those of you who have the pleasure of dining with me, lord knows i EAT. I know its hard for people to understand what it feels like to be picked on for being thin. It probably sounds narcissistic to even be talking about it, but goddamnit, i'm pissed. it's no ones business why I lost weight. it was a personal choice, to better myself. Its also no ones business how I did it. I'm smart and would never do anything to hurt myself. I would also never let myself get too skinny either. So please, don't ask me about my weight. It makes me very uncomfortable and upset. I would never have the courage to say this to anyone's face so this is why it's written here. I just want to live my life, the size that i am and not have to defend who I am.

( my xmas stocking )

I'm almost done with school for the semester!!! whooooooooooooo!!!!!!! My store was the MOST profitable City Downtown in GBC history!!! In other school news: Whats a 4.0 gpa with an F added in? anyone? anyone? Well thats more than likely going to be my GPA for this semester thanks to apparel buying simulation. The hardest part is over, thank GOD. Oh wait, no its not. All my tests got bumped around so I now have a total of 5 next week. Boooooooooooooooooooooooo. Anyhoo. My brain should restore itself by Thursday! Blast from the past; I'm going for a beer with Thistle on Tues. Also, House is on right after which is always super exciting! ANnnnnnnnnnnnnd? Yeah I have nothing else of substance to say here. Well, did i really saying anything of substance before? Not really......

There's a hoedown hoedown hoedown THERE!

GOODHANDY'S PRESENTS:

*King's Cabaret*
"A Hoedown"

-Starring The Cast of King's Cabaret-
Holden, Aidan Zaas and Rider Gently

-With Special Guest-
Justin Zaas

Friday Dec 8th, 12am
Goodhandys, 120 Church St. 2nd Floor
NO COVER CHARGE!!!

Come out and see the Kings! Guests are encouraged to dress for the occasion! So put on your best flannel shirt or the cleanest NASCAR t-shirt you own!

You fit in with: Humanism Your ideals mostly resemble that of a Humanist. Although you do not have a lot of faith, you are devoted to making this world better, in the short time that you have to live. Humanists do not generally believe in an afterlife, and therefore, are committed to making the world a better place for themselves and future generations. 20% scientific. 80% reason-oriented.

Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

Life rules because:


1) I'm probably not going to Florida (which sorta sucks because i wanted a tan)
2) King's Cabaret is hot show apparently.
3) I randomly got an email from a girl I knew in elementay school last week.
4) I magically bought a dress in a size 3 last week.
5) Lindsay's back from NYC
6) My expensive headphones AREN'T broken
7) My dog remembered who I was when I came home yesterday
8) City Downtown is gonna break even!!!!

Life semi-sucks because:

1) School devours my every move
2) I sit in meetings allllll day long
3) My buying class is sucking my will to live
4) I have to be at school until midnight on Weds and back at 7am on Thurs morning.
5) People ask too many questions about my weight
6) I've have a weird mark on my back since June and it wont go away
7) I can't yet afford my next uber-expensive tattoo
8) I have no idea what to get people for Christmas. For god sake people!! just TELLLL me what you want. I'm so good at this whole 'mind reading' thing. Well, sometimes I am, but you're probably not on the list of people who's minds I can read.



With that being said. Here is my Chrsitmas wish list: (in no particular order)

1) Romance by Ralph Lauren (perfume)
2) An Ipod
3) Red high top Cons
4) Text book money
5) Smart Set gift certificates
6) A gift certificate to Petsmart (well technically thats on Charles' list)
7) A tattoo
8) Marlboro Lights
9) A vaction to somewhere warm
10)John Mayer's new CD
11)New (black) Oxford tap shoes
12)Brown riding boots
13)A white sox baseball hat
14)Chapstick (the cherry kind)
15)A Massage
16)A laptop
17)Anderson Cooper's new book
18)Another Weinerdog or a chocolate lab
19)A bottle of Malibu rum
20)A case of Leinenkugal Berryweiss

(a sinful Chrstmas full of liquor, cigarettes and tattoos!)

Holy crap i have expensive taste.

You know when a celebrity is seen without their wedding ring (because it fell down the sink) or hugging a member of the opposite sex (who turns out to be their brother or sister) the headlines automatically read: SO AND SO: RELATIONSHIP OVER. I've found myself lately coming to the defense of my relationship. Honestly, who cares what my myspace says? Has anyone noticed that my occupation is Donkey Puncher and that I make $250,000+ per year? So take what you will from that stupid website. Its not a place where the real me exists. The real me is known by a very small group of people. You might even be surprised to find that you aren't one of those people. I mean people who can look into my eyes and know exactly what i'm feeling. People who know me so well they can predict my next gesture. People who can finish my sentences. I can count about 5 people in my life's entirety who know me, Sara. Not Rider or Sara from the bar, or Sara from school or Sara from work. I find it difficult when people who don't know me pry into my life. I know this is a bit of a rediculous statement considering I'm posting this in an online blog but hey, it goes to the masses and right now, i need a lot of people to hear a few things.
Lets get one thing straight. Im not. It biting my fingernails down to nubs thinking about the exact words i'm going to use when I make my parents world come crashing down. Maybe thats too presumptious, to think that my perceived heterosexuality holds my parent's world up. c'mon, im not that impressive. I bought this book called "Now That You Know". Im going to have it with me when i tell my parents. I just want something tangible to give them right away so they can have something to cling to (or to throw at my head!) Anyhow, I read it cover to cover. I want them to see that I didn't just grab any book for them. I asked which was the best at 3 different bookstores as well as checked Amazon and they all said this was the one. I also wanted to know what they were going to be reading. I can say that I don't know what it's like to have a child or even a gay one but at least I made the effort to try to understand.
My twin brother is in town! First off, let me say that my brother is uber-straight frat-boyish. He is also completely supportive of me. (I think in part because before he got here he thought I might introduce him to some jenna jameson-looking "lesbians") hahah yeah right! Anyhow, He ended coming to Goodhandy's the last two Fridays. He patted me on the back and said the shows were awesome. I didnt know how he would react seeing his "little sister" dressed like a dude, but he handled it like a champ and viewed it the same way I do, as a costume. Also, having Jeff here has led to many a conversation about my sexual orientation with my family. My mom's cousin and my aunt's best friend (Karel) are on the list of people just recently told. Their support and outreach has meant the world to me. Karel wrote me a letter last week saying how glad she was that i had "found my place in life" and how she was excited to meet Lindsay. I was almost moved to tears that a conservative, sheltered woman whom I've known most of my life would reach out to me like that. It meant more than she can ever know. Sometimes, with things like this, you need to hear that people care. With all this new found support from outside, Ive found my relationship with my aunt has gotten a lot better. She and I can talk openly about my life and relationship. Today she, karel and jeff had brunch with Lindsay and I. It went extremely well. You have to understand that i've only brought one other person home to meet my family ever. I was 16 and he was a boy. you do the math. It went really well though. I almost fell off my chair when my aunt asked Lindsay the obligatory lesbian question "Are you a vegetarian?".
In other awesome news, Lindsay and I have been together for 2 months now. I feel like its been a lot longer (not in a lagging sort of way tho). I can honestly say that I have never been more compatible with someone or happy in general. I'm going to cut off the homoness right there. Wouldnt want the word vomit to just spill right out!
I jsut need to get a firm grip on school right now. I'm up to my eyeballs in work and wondering where the time is going to come from.
I should probably put this on a postcard and send it to post secret but: sometimes in the middle of a number, i get nervous and wanna vomit and want to run off stage but I cant cuz im in the middle of a number.

-Sara

so im getting my depo shot today *snaps*. I called my doctors office to find out whether or not i should have the shot before or after i get my bloodwork done. the nurse, who is about the nicest lady you will ever meet, but also the most thorough, asks me if i've had my pregnancy test yet (because you can't go on depo if you're pregnant, something about the possibility of birth defects *yikes*) and i promptly tell her no, i wont need one. im definitely not pregnant. then she goes, "well we need to give one just to absolutely sure" then I reply "no, im 10000% sure im not pregnant" then she goes "well, we need to be sure" then i finally just go "if i was pregnant, my baby's name would be jesus. im not pregnant, im gay.". then she goes "oh. ok. come in at 1 for the shot then". you know how when you use the phrase "it's a female thing", men immediately stop asking about your situation? apparently "i'm gay" has the same effect on nurses.....

the most defeating thing to say is: "i can't do this anymore on my own. I need help."

my day is soooo off today. i feel all backwards and awkward. and now i have to go to a doctor's appointment. im seriously considering a hysterectomy. no seriously. i was a candidate at for it at 19 and still am. im seriously seriously seriously considering it. if they keep my ovaries in, i wont have to go on hormones. if they yank that god damned uterus out, my years and years of problems will finally be solved. and that makes me happy and not defective feeling. cuz nothing is worse than feeling defective

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine. As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

fuck it's early....fuck fuck fuck fuck..... why does the world start sooooooo early?!!?!?

1. YOUR SPY NAME: (middle name and current street name)

victoria binswood

2. YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME: (grandfather/grandmother on your dad's side, your favorite candy)

Meredith Juice Berries


3. YOUR RAP NAME: (first initial of first name, first three or four letters of your last name)

S-Rod


4. YOUR GAMER TAG: (a favorite color, a favorite animal)

Red Wiener Dog


5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born)

Victoria Toronto


6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (first 3 letters of your last name, last 3 letters of mother's maiden name, first 3 letters of your pet's name)

Rodsoncha


7. JEDI NAME: (middle name spelled backwards, your mom's maiden name spelled backwards)

airotciv nosredneh

8. PORN STAR NAME: (first pet's name, the street you grew up on)

Charlie Farieno

9. SUPERHERO NAME: ("The", your favorite color, the automobile your mom drives)

The Red Jaguar


10. YOUR ACTION HERO NAME: (first name of a main character in the last movie you watched, last food you ate)

John Sandwich

I've decided that the only people I want in my life are those who truly want to be a part of mine. I want those who support me no matter what, are always honest, will love me unconditionally and who always have my back. I'm slowly but surely eliminating the ones who don't fit this criteria.

<td align="center">Using your hands



Your sexual hidden talent is your ability to use your hands. You are damn good with them, and know how to make your lover feel incredibly sexy with just one caress.

Take this quiz at QuizUniverse.com</td>


<td align="center"> You are sexy.



You instantly attract. You find it extremely easy to seduce someone as all it takes is a look in their direction.

'What is your seduction style?' at QuizUniverse.com</td>

i just found my lipgloss that tastes like cake frosting. this makes me super happy. and hungry.